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Safety Tips

#1 We suffered for your benefit.  The most important rule in chatting up your dream girl is to be like a well attentive learner driver.  Check mirrors at all time before heading into dangerous curves.  Clearly, a beautiful women like her will always have speed bumps (i.e. boyfriends, body guard) for protection from desperate losers, no reference intended to our sophisticated readers.

#2  Martial Arts classes are a necessity in delicately delivering humorous, sometimes insulting, lines.  Quite reflexes are a must!  A cup is also required equipment when in potentially hazardous situations.

[When you see her waiting for someone] “If he doesn’t turn up, I’ll be over there.” 

“Forgive me, but I’m an artist and it’s my job to stare at beautiful women.” 

“Hi, I make more money than you can spend.” 

“I have had a really bad day and it always makes me feel better to see a beautiful lady smiling. So, would you smile for me?” 

“I’m no good at opening lines so why don’t we pretend we know each other.”   

“In this light, your hair looks like silk.” 

“If your parents hadn’t met, I’d be a very unhappy man right now.” 

“Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see!” 

“Is there an airport nearby or is that just my heart taking off?” 

“Was your father an alien? Because there’s nothing else like you on earth!” 

“You know, you look really hot. You must be the real reason for global warming.”

“Want to see my stamp collection?” 

“You’re strangely sexy for such an ugly woman.” 

“You’re a lovelier sight than a beer truck pulling up in my driveway!” 

“If I told you you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?” 

“Is your father a baker? Because you've got great buns!” 

“Treat me right, and I can get you off Santa’s naughty list!” 

“I’m a fertility God in some underdeveloped nations.” 

“Do you have a library card? Good, cause I wanna check you out!” 

“Do you have a boyfriend?  Would you like a spare?”

“Hi, I have been watching you dance for a while now, and to be honest, you are terrible, let me buy you a drink and we can talk about it.” 

“Hi, can I buy you several drinks?” 

“So, what do you do when you’re not turning men to jelly?” 

“You look confused. Drink I can you a buy?” 

“You see my friend over there? He wants to know if you think I’m cute.”   

“Congratulations! You’ve been voted Most Beautiful Lady in this Room and the grand prize is a night with me!” 

[When she is buying a drink] “Hi! Can I buy you a car with that drink?” 

“What does a guy like me have to do to get a phone number like yours?”

“What’s a great girl like you doing in a lecture room like this?” 

“You turn my system on.” 

[At a photo copy machine] “Reproducing, eh? Let me help.” 

“’No Entry’, right? Oh, just trying to guess your sign.” 

“Hi, the voices in my head told me to come over here and talk to you.”

1)     “I don’t know your name, but I’d really like to call you mine.” 

2)     “You’re what God had in mind when He said, “Let there be woman”.” 

3)     “You are the reason men/women fall in love.”   

4)      “Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?”   

5)      “If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put U and I together.” 

6)      “Your body is over 90% water, and I’m really thirsty.” 

7)      “Are you a model? You should be. 

8)      "Did it hurt...when you fell to Earth from Heaven?" 

9)      "Was your father a thief, because he stole the stars and put them in your eyes." 

10)  “Somebody call the police – it’s got to be illegal to look that good.”